The Super Bore

I won’t be watching the Super Bore (I mean the Super Bowl) this Sunday. I need to like at least one of the two teams playing in the championship game, or at the bare minimum be able to whole-heartedly root for one of them, to be enticed into viewing the 4-hour plus spectacle. That criteria definitely was not met this past football season. I’m about as thrilled to watch Super Bowl 49, as I am at the prospect of sending either Jeb Bush or Hillary Clinton to the Oval Office during the next presidential election. I can’t bear the thought of another Bush or Clinton running this country, but on the bright side at least they’re not Ted Cruz or Donald Trump.

The Seattle Seahawks won the Super Bowl last year, and I don’t particularly care for “repeating” in any sport unless of course it’s my team. Whether when speaking of politics or professional football I say, “give somebody else a chance.” However, if the New England Patriots win we’ll never know for certain how legitimate their season truly was leading up to the big game. More on that later. I’m sure my lovely wife will be watching this year’s Super Bowl since nowadays she seems to be a bigger fan of the National Football League than I am.

I used to crave NFL game days, but I think watching overpaid athletes constantly showboating and heaping praise upon themselves ultimately grew too tiresome for me. I’m sure you know the type of person I’m speaking of because they are a dime a dozen in the NFL. A player makes a touchdown, an interception, a fumble recovery, a sack, or even a nice tackle, and his teammates are wanting to congratulate him, but more often than not the individual pushes them aside (literally and figuratively) to find an open space on the football field to celebrate alone. I assume the player does this so there’s no mistaking, to anyone who may have blinked, who he thinks deserves to be applauded for the previous play. Hellooo…it’s your job!

Someone did ask, after hearing my intentions for not watching the Super Bowl, “but what about the commercials?” I momentarily considered taping the ballgame, so I could fast forward through the boring matchup and enjoy the annually heralded commercials at a later date. I then quickly realized how asinine even the thought of that resonated in my head. Was I actually going to purposefully expend some of my time and energy on watching an array of mostly overrated advertisements, that are force-fed apparently to an eagerly willing audience, aired during the National Football League’s biggest game of the year? No!

Besides, the viewing of Super Bowl commercials aren’t a once in a lifetime event. I’m sure eventually I’ll see all of them a time or two whether I want to or not in the coming weeks. Admittedly, I absolutely am an admirer of the majority of Hallmark commercials. The sappy ones they show during Hallmark movies, a combination of new commercials as well as the classics, are well worth turning on the television set to watch. I’ve been known to shed a few tears (okay, streams of tears) more so during those darn commercials than during the Hallmark presentation itself.

Now for the elephant in the room. I recently have heard New England Patriots’ Head Coach, Bill Belichick, referred to by some as Bill Belicheat although I’m not entirely sure he’s the only one in the organization deserving of such a demeaning nickname. However, Coach Belichick and the entire Patriots’ Organization does seem to be adding to their reputations as cheaters (ala “Spygate”) in the NFL. “Spygate,” in case you haven’t heard by now, was when the Patriots were caught illegally videotaping their opponents’ defensive coaches’ signals during a 2007 game against the New York Jets.

In addition, during the “Spygate” investigation, it was discovered that New England had been conducting similar videotaping of their opponents since Mr. Belichick took over as head coach in 2000. This quite possibly means the Patriots had an unfair advantage against their opponents in Super Bowls 36, 38, and 39, too. Coach Belichick was fined $500,000, the Patriots were fined $250,000, and the team was stripped of their first round draft pick the following season for their indiscretion. The fine incurred by Mr. Belichick remains the harshest penalty ever handed down to an NFL coach. The Patriots advanced to the championship game during the “Spygate” season, but they did lose to the New York Giants in Super Bowl 42. I can’t complain.

The latest allegation against New England, cleverly deemed “Deflategate,” has encompassed the team, tarnishing their reputation even further, as they are trying to prepare for the upcoming Super Bowl. Supposedly, 11 of the 12 footballs provided by the Patriots’ offensive unit were found to be under-inflated after their latest playoff victory against the Indianapolis Colts. Something happened to the pigskins between the time the referees checked them, approximately two hours prior to game time, and the kickoff. I don’t exactly know where the buck should stop when attempting to lay blame: the Patriots’ Owner, the General Manager, Coach Belichick, or the players themselves. Maybe some astute ball boy summoned his courage and ingenuity, however ill-advised, in hopes of trying to do what he could to help the home team.

The fact is that rules were allegedly broken by the New England Patriots’ Organization…again. A reader of mine (yes, I have a few) replied to a prior blog claiming, “where there’s smoke, there’s fire,” in disagreeing with my particular stance on an issue. I will use that same adage in this circumstance although he surely won’t appreciate it because, if I remember correctly, he is a Patriots’ fan. If you are an Indianapolis Colts’ fan please cover your ears at this time. The Patriots undeniably obliterated the Colts on the football field, and it would not have mattered whether the footballs were slightly under-inflated, over-inflated, or as flat as a pancake. New England obviously would’ve kicked some major butt that day regardless which then makes trying to gain the slightest edge by illegally deflating balls seem all the more ridiculous.

That being said, I do not know how in good conscience the NFL can allow cheaters to participate in this year’s championship game if they desire to maintain a shred of integrity. The League is more than willing to suspend players, based on allegations alone, yet it’s painfully evident they’re enacting some sort of “the game must go on” mentality when it comes to holding an entire NFL organization accountable. The right thing to do would be to banish the Patriots from Super Bowl 49. Unfortunately, I’m certain that wasn’t even considered because trying to find another team on such short notice, and deciphering which team is most deserving to fill the vacancy, would be nearly impossible. The Colts? I don’t think so.

A case definitely could be made for the Baltimore Ravens to fill the vacant slot. They lost to New England, the previous week of the playoffs, but only by a measly 4 points. That game was also played on the Patriots’ home field, so there’s a strong possibility New England’s offense was using deflated footballs then as well. This discussion, as riveting as it may be, is pointless since surely the locker-rooms of the remaining 30 teams have already been cleared out, and many players are probably vacationing, fishing, or camping out somewhere in the wilderness by now. Some players possibly may be out of shape by this time while others may have already begun a necessary recovery process due to a very punishing, long season.

Regardless, the biggest game of the year will go on as scheduled, pitting the Seattle Seahawks against the New England Patriots, amidst a cloud of speculation and deceit. For me, deciding which team to root for in Super Bowl 49, is reminiscent of the selection process I’ve encountered when choosing which candidates to support in many of the most recent elections. I’m usually forced to ask myself, “Who is the lesser of two evils?” I cast my vote for the Seattle Seahawks although I still won’t be watching the Super Bore (I mean the Super Bowl) this Sunday.

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2 responses to “The Super Bore

  • Leslie Kohler

    I will not be watching the Super Bowl either, but I am very glad for our beautiful “Valley of the Sun” to be hosting it. The Super Bowl, the Pro Bowl, the Phoenix Open and the Barrett-Jackson car show to all be held here in such a short span is good for our local economy. That being said, not many of us ordinary folks can afford to attend most of these events anyway.

  • Barry Blackstone

    Jim, I, too, used to be a rabid football fan. However, for the reasons you stated, I could care less now. I used to be a Hillary supporter. But I no longer support her for anything. While she was SOS, her main advisor was a lady named Huma Abbaden, Mrs. Anthony Weiner. Her brother and mother are higher ups in the Egyptian muslim brotherhood. They were the main bad guys at the attack on our embassy. How did this woman pass an FBI background check?
    Barry

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